Gabe: The greatest hero who ever lived
by gabriel ricard
Summary: My ff7 series returns with a brand spankin new special! taking place roughly after the nintendo strikes back saga, Gabe puts together an epic film starring the whole ff7 gang! A must read for those who drink heavily and take lots of medication!


Gabe: the greatest fan fic hero ever 

Gabe: the greatest fan fic hero ever

An FF7 fat-free special

Written by Gabe Ricard

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the star and main hero of this story Gabe Ricard so fight all you want you can't have him.

I could write several pages ranting about the controversial element of fan fiction that is Mary Sue but I won't. While I have developed this series from a personal escape (not ego trip as some may say) to kind of a parody to all the Mary Sue fics that are written this kicks it into overdrive with Gabe and the others making a movie that's really nothing more then a massive overblown Mary Sue story, And because of that has been poorly written on purpose. This is something I've wanted to do out of frustration for people taking series and fan fics like my FF7 series too seriously and some not even giving these type of things a chance because of the authors decision to include themselves. So, confused enough? I hope so because if you aren't then I'm just not doing my job…enjoy. To appreciate this requires a knowledge of Mary Sue fics and my ff7 series. Or you can get wasted…that might make it funnier. If you are one of the few that follow this series, I'm not if takes place after the Nintendo Strikes Back saga or not… I suppose it does but it's kind of an in between special. The "movie" that's made is loosely based on an FF7 sequel fic I wrote almost four years ago. I never used it because the core idea was too stupid even for my tastes of that time.

And I'm aware since an episode of the ff7 series has appeared in the "new" section (the last ten stories have been in the Nintendo Strikes Back saga and ff.net doesn't put the story at the front for you so the potential readership suffered somewhat). If you have no idea what's going on then go check out some of the other episodes that have been done thus far.

Man I sure can talk eh? Anyway, enjoy the story if you can…it was quite a bit of fun writing it.

"Well…the big day's here," smiled Cloud knowingly making his way into the Midgar Megaplex with Aeris and the rest of the gang. Everyone was decked out in rather expensive looking clothes.

"Yeah…well it only took four days to shoot the entire movie," replied Gabe. "I'm quite impressed at how quickly I was able to write this thing."

"I still think it's the biggest fucking ego trip I've ever seen," maintained Cid.

"You would," replied Gabe shooting Cid an annoyed glare. "That's part of the joke so shut the hell up."

"So everyone's here for the films premiere?"

"Yep." Avalanche walked down a long hallway of theaters and came to one-marked 56A. Cid kicked the door open as if it was a drug bust and walked in not bothering to hold the door open for anyone else. Shera saw the long row of empty seats in the third row and directed everyone to them. Everyone quickly seated themselves except Gabe who went up to the front to make an announcement 

Barret noticed Sephiroth watching in the corner and nudged Vincent pointing towards Sephiroth. "Remember what happened to him the first day we started shooting?"

Vincent gave a rare smile, "Indeed."

**__**

FLASSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHBAAAAAAAAACKKKKKKKKK 

"This has to be the worst script I've ever seen," growled Cid flipping the last page over and throwing it on the table.

"Nonsense," reassured Gabe standing in Tifa's 7th Heaven in New Nibelheim. A few dozen empty beer bottles (and two empty bottles of vodka) lay about the place. A beautiful, cold wind beat against the windows and the potential for snow seemed to hang on edge forever. 

"I like it," replied Shera. Shera had been harboring desires of acting since she was a little girl and here at last was her opportunity. She would not let Sally Field, in her mind the greatest actress ever down.

"Thanks Shera. Come on Cid, this'll be fun and besides, we shoot this baby today so there's no more complaining." The rest of the FF7 heroes were indifferent to this but still thought it was a little stupid. "Now, has everyone memorized their scripts?"

"Yes," replied everyone in unison.

"I also think it's an excuse for you to have long hair," continued Cid.

Gabe rolled his eyes. Cid had only made mention of this 6000 times. "Yeah Cid, this whole movie was made for the sole purpose of me having long black hair."

"I knew it."

"Great now we-"

"I'm here! I'm here!" Sephiroth burst into the bar and appeared to be incredibly out of breath.

"Yes you are here," replied Cloud shaking his head. "Why?"

Sephiroth ignored Cloud and turned to Gabe, "I hardly ever get to be in this series so I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving me work. With the money I'm getting from this I can FINALLY get a place to live. Goodbye box!:

"Oh hey Sep, bad news…turns out we can get someone better to play you."

"WHO?!"

"Christopher Walken."

"SON OF A BITCH!!!! Name one thing that no talent ass clown can do that I can't!"

"Beat the life out of stupid punks," came the dark tone of Christopher Walken.

"Wha?!" Sephiroth spun around to meet Christopher Walken who kneed Sephiroth once in the crotch then again in the face as he was kneeled over. As everyone gathered around Christopher, Sephiroth favoring the crotch over the broken nose crawled out of the bar.

"Glad you could come by man," said Gabe shaking his hand.

"It's my pleasure," Christopher surprised Gabe by embracing him. He then whispered to him, "If I don't get my money by Tuesday, your girlfriend will sleep with the fishes."

"Sure thing," Gabe let go of Christopher and gave Tifa a nervous smile.

"So you read over the script?" asked Aeris.

Christopher nodded and snatched an unlit cigarette from Cid and lit it for himself. "Yeah…it's a good part. So when do we start?"  


"Right now."

**__**

ENDDDDDD OFFFFFFF FLASSSSSHHHHBBBBBAAAAAACKKKKKK

"Okay everyone settle down," Gabe coughed loudly into the mic and caused everyone to quiet down and look up at him. "This movie was made pretty much for the hell of it. It's a work of love and labor and I want to thank all of you for being here. Also noted that this entire thing was put together by me, the writing, directing, producing so when you direct your imminent praise, and accolation to me. So without further ado, sit back and enjoy." Gabe walked off the stand and headed to his seat as the lights dimmed and the movie began.

"So what do you think we'll see tonight?" asked S3 sitting in the balcony with Lotuss Tears.

"A pile of horse manure!" replied Lotuss prompting the two to laugh not unlike two old puppet guys from a certain Muppet show.

**__**

We got movie signnnnn!!!

**__**

"Now," began Cid mumbling to himself as he lit a cigarette. "How in the hell am I gonna fix this plane," Cid circled around the plane once and shook his head. He really had no clue. He had been doing little more than walking around it, trying to think of what to do with it but the design and mechanics were unlike anything he had ever dealt with. Still, if he could bring this thing back to full restoration he could have one the best planes he ever owned. 

As he stood back to give the plane a complete look over he wondered what time Shera would be home. When he heard someone coming to the backyard where he was, he thought that it was her and she had come back much earlier then expected. "Hey, Shera did you bring that-" Cid turned around expecting to see his recently married wife but instead met with a sword coming into contact with his chest slicing the middle open. Cid opened his mouth to scream but was cut off as a knee was driven into his gut knocking the wind out of him. Cid stumbled back and saw several men dressed in ninja costumes. Not knowing where his Venus Gospel was, Cid swung a wild punch at the first ninja that got close, missed by a mile and landed on his stomach. Cid looked up to see one man walk towards him, the only one not wearing a ninja outfit. Cid had a moment to look up into the face of his attacker, and the last thought that went through his head was _who's this guy_? Moments later, the mystery man drove the blade into Cid's face twisting it around and then pulling it out. He heard someone coming near and disappeared just as Shera walked in and let out a shrill, terrified scream.

Gabe Ricard Pictures presents

A Gabe Ricard film

Featuring Gabe Ricard in

Gabe: The greatest hero there ever was

Starring

Gabe Ricard

With numerous others filling in various, unimportant roles

Music by Gabe Ricard

Based on the screenplay by Gabe Ricard

Written by Gabe Ricard

Produced by Gabe Ricard

Directed by Gabe Ricard

Music by Gabe Ricard

Wardrobe by Gabe Ricard

Haircare by Gabe Ricard

Legal Representation by Gabe Ricard

Filmed by Gabe Ricard

With special thanks to: Gabe Ricard

"IIIII Toooooold yewww, I ain't a leaving!" Tifa Lockheart stared across at the drunk who just wouldn't go away a habit this particular drunk had been engaging in the last couple days. Tifa was tempted to break his nose and kick him out the door but the good citizens of Nibelheim deserved a bit nicer then the MO she used in Midgar so she persisted in her attempts to kick him out without resorting to violence.

"Look, you don't have to go home but you can't stay here."

"But I-guh!" The drunk suddenly slumped to the ground and in his place stood Cloud holding his sword and smiling broadly at his girlfriend.

Tifa leaned over the table and gulped, "Cloud honey you killed him!"  


Cloud shrugged and slid the sword into the holster on his back.. "Let god sort em out," he looked Aeris up and down and smiled, "So Tiffs…you wanna be my Saturday night thing?"

"It's Thursday Cloud."

Cloud reached behind the counter and slipped an arm around Tifa's perfect proportioned waist, "Every night's Saturday night baby," he leaned forward and proceeded to give her a long passionate kiss that was full of passion. "So, let's get out of here and make wild and passionate whoopee."

"Fine, let me close up." Tifa yawned and began to wipe the blood and excess liquor when suddenly, Barret burst into the bar taking everyone by surprise.

"Barret!" exclaimed Cloud. "You took us by surprise!"

"Y-Y-Y-Y" it was quite obvious that Barret was out of breath and even more obvious that this was because he was running.

"Spit it out dude!" cried Cloud slapping Barret on the back.

"You gotta come with me…somethings happened…to Cid!"

"So?"

"He's dead!" silence suddenly crushed the room.

"Dead….?" Whispered Tifa. "How? What happened?"

"We're not sure…we got everyone in Rocket Town and they sent me to get you guys so let's go!" 

"Okay!!" they both cried running out with Barret before Tifa could even lock up.

**__**

At Rocket Town… 

"Shera…" said Vincent putting his metal arm on her shoulder. "I'm sorry you're in pain."

Shera sobbed into her hankerchief, "Thank you Vincent. It's nice…to have…a young…strong…man….like….you….around." Shera gave him a seductive smile. Vincent said nothing.

"We're here!" cried Cloud and Tifa at the same time running into the house with Barret. Cloud looked around and saw that everyone was there.

"Wow!" said Tifa. "Everyone's here!"

"Yeah…so what do we do now?" asked Red XIII. "What should we do to find out who Cid's killer is?"

"YOU CAN DIE!!" roared a sinister voice from outside.

"What's THAT?!?!" exclaimed Cait Sith.

"I DON'T know," replied Cloud. "Let's go out and kick some ass!"

"Yeah!" agreed Barret running out of the house with everyone else.

Once they were all outside, they were met by a sinister looking man who had a small army of ninja's all around him. This made Yuffie nervous, as she seemed to recognize the apparent leader of this group. "Who the hell are you?" asked Cloud.

"My name…is not important. What is important is that I am here to kill all of you!"  


"Why? Who sent you!"  


"That is for you to know and me to find out!" cried the mystery man.

"That BASTARD!!" cried Tifa. "He won't tell us!" she turned to Cloud. "What should we do?"

"Have sex till this blows over?" 

"NO!"

"Awww."

"How about," began Barret. "We KICK SOME ASS!!!"

"Good idea!" agreed Vincent.

"I like that!" said Cait Sith.

"Me too!" growled Red XIII showing off his wicked cool pointy teeth. The battle began and began with a fury. Cloud cut through Ninja's like old cheese. Red actually devoured one ninja with a new attack and Barret shot one in the nuts, giggled with demented glee and blew his head off. Tifa clotheslined one ninja then dropped an elbow on his throat and covered getting a 3 count and causing the ninja to explode.

The head ninja and thought in a voice not unlike CHRISTOPHER WALKEN, "Hmmm, I'm getting my booty kicked! I better unleash the ninja attack of _DEATH_. And I myself better be the one to unleash it's wicked power!!! But to do this I MUST….REMOVE MY MASK!!!!" the head ninja jumped back and tore his mask off and jumping in front of the heroes.

"Hey," said Cait Sith. "You look like Christopher Walken!"

"Indeed," cackled the ninja who noticed that the other ninjas were gone but smiled cause he knew there were more. Oh yes, there were MANY, MANY more. "But my name is…TENCHI!!!"  


Everyone gasped, "Tenchi?!!"

"Yes…TENCHI!!! But that's not important. What's important is that…YOUR TIME IS UP!!! PREPARE TO DIE!!!!" Tenchi jumped into the heroes and it was evident from the start, that he was kicking everyones asses like there was no tomorrow. Cloud was elbowed in the throat, Barret was kicked in the nuts, Cait was stuffted into the moggles mouth and thrown into Vincent.

"We…can't….fight him!" cried Cloud.

"Your right!" agreed Red XIII. "And there's more ninja's!"

"We need help!" exclaimed Barret holding his nuts from getting kicked so many times. "But who? Whooooo?!?!" Suddenly a sword flew out of nowhere and went through eight ninjas and landed on the ground. Everyone stopped to see where it came from. And where it came from was the strong, steady hand of a young man who obviously reeked of incredible power. Everyone took a long, hard look at this youth, this increible youth. Wearing a leather jacket, black leather pants, a NIN shirt with long black hair to exenuate all this great stuff. In his powerful left hand was an incredible samurai sword of amazing power.

"Who the hell are you?!" demanded Tenchi.

"Names…Gabe."

"Gabe," thought Tifa. "What a wonderful name."

"Well…PREPARE TO DIE!!!" Tenchi pointed at Gabe and all of the ninjas who were there, save for Tenchi charged at Gabe who smiled and sliced up every ninja in a matter of seconds with breathtaking skill. Tenchi was at a loss for words, "I…I'm at a loss for words." He saw everyone looking at him. "BYE!!!" Tenchi turned and threw a smoke bomb on the ground, when the smoke cleared Tenchi was gone.

"He's gone!" exclaimed Barret.

"But where damn it? WHERREEEEEEE!!!" screamed Cloud. 

Vincent walked over to him and slapped him, "Get a hold of yourself man."

Cloud held the spot on his face where he had been slapped and felt strangely aroused. He ignored it and turned to Gabe, "So who ARE you."  


"I already told you…it's Gabe."

"Gabe," said Tifa smiling. "That's…a wonderful name."

"I know. I was named after my mothers favorite horse."

"Wow really?"

"Yes."

"Impressive."

"I agree." Cloud noticed how absorbed Tifa and Gabe were in their conversation and began to feel annoyed. He didn't even know this amazing person and he was already hitting on his wife and the mother of 12 children. 

"So what should we do now?" asked Cait Sith. 

"Have lunch?" asked Red XIII.

"Nooo." Cait slapped the back of his head.

"Stop that!"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Pretty please?"

"No."

"Pretty please with sugar on-"

"CAN WE JUST GO BACK TO THE DAMN BAR?!?" cried Cloud.

"Okay," said everyone at once but Gabe.

Cloud turned to Gabe. "You gonna come with us?"

"Yeah."

"Okay."

**__**

Back…AT THE BAR!!!…. 

"So what do we do about Tenchi?" asked Tifa. 

"Cry like little girls?" suggested Barret.

"Bad idea," growled Gabe. "We need to kick this guys ass and kick it good."

Cloud nodded. "I like your thinking Gabe."

"Me too," said Tifa. "Can we go somewhere and discuss a strategy?"

Cloud grabbed Tifa and swirled her around, "Baby, I'll take you anywhere you wanna go." Tifa swooned and the two walked off.

"Geez Cloud," remarked Barret scratching his nuts. "That's rough."

"What? they're just going to discuss strategy."

"Okay."

"So, what do we do about these ninjas?"

"Let's kick their asses!"

"Good idea!"

"Let's go!"

"Okay!"

"But where are they?" asked Red XIII. The room fell silent.

**__**

Twenty minutes later…

"My house?" asked Cait Sith.

"Nah."

"Cosmo Canyon?"

"Maybe."

"Downstairs?"

"No Yuffie." At this, Tifa and Gabe emerged from the room with Tifa giggling.

"Did you two come up with a good strategy?" asked Cloud.

"Oh YEAH!" Tifa fell into another giggle.

"We're trying to figure out where the ninja army went." Said Vincent. "Any ideas?"

"They're in a base at Mideel. They took over the village and forced the people out."

"How do you know this?" asked Cait Sith.

Gabe scowled, looking wicked evil cool as he did. "I know everything."

"Wow."

"So let's go."

"Right." Everyone turned and ran out with asskicking on their mind.

**__**

At Mideel…

"Sir this village is a piece of shit! Why are we here?" 

Tenchi glared, "Because I LIKE PALM TREES!!"

"I don't see any."

Tenchi responded by reaching over and tearing the ninja's heart out then pulling down his hood so he could stuff it down. He turned to the other ninjas with a mouth full of human heart, "Put the body in the freezer. I can eat it later."

"Yes sir!" two ninjas picked up the body and stuffed it in a nearby freezer.

"Sir!"

"What is it?"

"Well it's the heroes sir…they're here."

"Have they come for tea?"

"No sir, I think they're after something much more then that. I don't know what, but they brought a flag."

"Well that's dash cunning of them. Have we got our bait ready?"

"Yep."

"Good."

"Thank you sir."

"You're welcome."

"Thank you for that also sir."

"You're welcome for that as well."

"And thank you-"

"JUST GO!!!"

"Okay sir! Thank you for yelling sir!" the ninja gave a salute and ran off.

**__**

At the entrance to Mideel…

"Well we're here," grumbled Cloud holding his sword in the battle position.

"Indeed." Replied Gabe. "Let's go take this dude down."

"Oh Gabe before we go in…" said Barret.

"Yes?"

"We've decided that we'd be lost with out your amazing leadership skills so…we want you to be the new leader of Avalanche."

"I guess."

"Thank you!" they all cried. Except for Cloud who was pouting.

"Now let's go take this guy out." The others nodded and ran in meeting a group of ninjas as they did. A fierce battle began with many casualties. All of them ninjas! Soon the ninja strike force was gone and the group spread out to find Tenchi. Cloud led Tifa, and Barret. Cait Sith and Red XIII went in one direction. Vincent, Yuffie went another way. Gabe went out on his own.

"NINTEY NINE BOTTLES OF BEEEERRRR!!"

"Cait stop that!" said Red XIII sharply.

"Aw come on Red we killed all those ninjas. All we gotta do is find this Tenchi guy and blow da whistle."

"We won't be blowing anything if you won't stop singing that damn song!"

"Okay…but you gotta do one thing."

"What?"

"Sing one single course with me."

"Hell and no."

"Pleaseeee?"

"Okay…but just one."

**__**

Ten minutes later…

Both sat there. "TAKE ONE DOWN PASSSSS EEEEEEAAATTTTTTT AROUND SEVENTY ONE-" both stopped abruptly as something came out of nowhere and kicked them both in the back of the head. Tenchi smirked, "Seventy one bottles of beer on the wall."

**__**

Elsewhere…

"No Yuffie, we can't have sex. We gotta find this guy and kick his ass," Vincent had his gun on his arm and was ready to shoot the next motherfucker that bugged him. Yuffie was getting there.

"Did you hear that?" asked Yuffie suddenly.

"No." silence pressed on.

"How about now?"

"No."

"Now?"

"NO GOD DAMN IT!!!" Vincent a moment later, DID hear something and spun around to shoot but before he could, a small knife flew in front of him and cut the front of his gun off. Vincent yelped and turned around to see four ninjas upon Yuffie, beating her to the ground. Vincent decided at that moment, to change into Hellmasker but before he could he felt a dart fly into the back of his neck and then everything went dark.

**__**

Elsewhere…

"YOU'RE LEAVING ME?!?" Cried Cloud.

"Yes Cloud I'm sorry."

"B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-but why?!?"

"I've fallen in love with someone else."  


"Oh god…please don't tell me it's-"

"Gabe? I'm afraid so."

"But why?"

"Because…I love him."

"What about our 17 children?!"

"You can raise them."

"God damn it! This isn't fair!"

"I'm sorry Cloud."

"Hey," interrupted Barret. "There's a bunch of ninjas over there!" Cloud and Tifa ignored him and continued arguing but were right behind Barret the whole time. Soon they were right behind the group of ninjas who were near a house.

"Let's get em," suggested Barret.

"But I can't breast feed the twins!" cried Cloud in reply.

"ARGHHHHH!!! DIEEEEEEEEE!!!" Barret charged at the ninjas firing like a demented child. He took several of them by surprise but was soon overwhelmed and dragged off. Cloud and Tifa were still arguing. But soon came to a stop as a gernade like device landed next to them and created a cloud of smoke that sent the two off to dream land.

**__**

Later on…

Gabe had a feeling he was the only one left and when he saw everyone tied up inside the largest building in Mideel knew it was true. It was all up to him. If he didn't take out the ninjas it was quite obvious they would overtake the planet. And god help the world if that happened. He kept his hand on his sword and leaped into the house seeing four ninjas on sight and killing them all without blinking. More ninjas came and one by one they got the same treatment. Gabe wondered with stoic silence just how many of these ninjas there were. Finally they stopped coming and Gabe knew they were done. But Tenchi remained. Gabe made his way through the building and came to the room where everyone was tied up. Everyone except for Cloud thanked Gabe for showing up to save them. "Don't worry about it."

"They will…when they DIE!!!" Gabe whirled around to see Tenchi standing in the doorway. "What do you want?" asked Gabe. "Why are you doing this?"

"Insurance…once Avalanche is gone I will have no problem taking over this world."  


"Well that ain't happenin."

"Really?"

"Yep."

"You're sure?"

"Very."

"How sure?"

"About 99.9 percent."

"Well what about that .01 percent?"

"What about it?"

"Then you're not completely sure."

"Yeah I am."

"How so?"

"That .01 percent is just benefit of the doubt."

"Is it?"

"Yep."

"Then show me."

"I will."

"Okay then." Gabe charged at Tenchi and the two immediately began to trade attacks. Tenchi gained an early edge and knocked Gabe back but Gabe soon regained the edge and cut Tenchi's hand off." Tenchi screamed and continued to fight but just couldn't keep up with the fantastic fighting ability of Gabe. It was as if God himself had blessed his mad skillz as he proceeded to knock Tenchi's sword away and held the sword at his throat.

"You've beaten me," growled Tenchi. "Finish me off."

"No…I'm not like you Tenchi. I'm going to let you live." Gabe turned around to free his friends but as he did Tenchi got to his feet and charged at Gabe who turned around and sliced his head off. Gabe said nothing only reaching over and untying everyone.

"I say we give three cheers for Gabe!" everyone cheered except Cloud who walked up to Gabe who happened to have an arm around Tifa. "Gabe…"

"Yeah?"

"Way to kick his ass." Cloud high fived him.

"Thanks." Everyone began to leave. Cloud sighed, "Now…I'm all alone."

"Hi Cloud!"

"Aeris?!"

"Yeah Cloud I'm back from the dead and I love YOU!" Aeris leapt into his arms and began kissing him wildly as he carried her off with the others into the sunset.

End.

Credits Roll

**__**

Movieeeee overrrrrrrrr 

"God in heaven what have we done…" Cloud put his face in his hands and began to cry.

"I know isn't it great?" at that moment, Gabe felt akin to Orson Welles the moment he had finished _Citizen Kane_. He emerged from his seat and walked to the aisle, heading up to the front. He noticed that everyone bore the same zombified look on their faces. They also looked a bit pale. Gabe assumed this was standard reaction to a film of this magnitude and took to the podium. "That was the film everyone…now I know your all are wishing there'll be more so with that, I am pleased to announce that are EIGHT…count em EIGHT sequels in the works."

Silence was the only response Gabe got for a moment before Stone Cold Steve Austin stood up, threw a beer can at Gabe and raised his hands crying, "KILL THE SON OF A BITCH!!!" This managed to rouse everyone except Avalanche who tried to get to Gabe but knew it was futile. Gabe, feeling like Tommy Lee Jones in _Natural Born Killers_ dove to a clean spot and bolted for the door running out into the cold and turning to see the small crowd throwing things at him. He know felt more like John Travolta the moment he finished _Battlefield Earth._

Alice Cooper watched Gabe run and turned to Cloud, "I liked it."

"You would. So when can we expect you to try and kill us all again?"

"Oh…pretty soon. I just released a new album so I'm busy with that."

"I heard it, it's pretty good."

"Thanks…well I'll see you pretty soon. Best of luck in our next fight."  


"Yeah you too." Alice put his hands into the pocket of his long, sleek black trench coat and walked off.

"Should we save him?" asked Aeris pointing ahead to Gabe who was still being chased in the distance.

"Nah…we're doing society a favor." 

End.

Well that's it for this little special of mine. I did in fact, have a lot of fun writing this and hope it gives a better idea of just how bad a fan fic can be. Not that I'm much better…anyway thanks for reading and don't be shy about telling me how much this sucks. 


End file.
